Out of Tune Torture

Another hectic day of work ended as I quicked emailed one last excel file to my manager, locked my computer and ran to the elevator. This was not my usual "get me the hell out of this place before anymore hairs turn gray" rush home. I had plans after work. I was going to a concert. I was going to my little cousin's concert at my old high school.

I walked into the high school and was surprised at how small it now seemed. I laugh when I enter a bathroom stall. I'd forgotten how low the toilets were and that they didn't use real toilet paper. Instead it's little 4 inch squares that must be pulled out from the dispenser one by one. As I sat waiting for the performance to begin, I marveled at how young the kids looked. I remember how, at their age, my friends and I thought we knew everything - Ha! It seemed as if every other child had a cell phone (I was taught that pagers and cell phones were only for drug dealers - double ha!). And I made an attempt to spot the sluts... it wasn't too hard. Girls barely just beginning puberty sporting short skirts that end right below their butts, tight-ass jeans, low cut shirts and other outfits that I'm still not allowed to wear.

Then the torture began. 7th grade orchestra and intermediate orchestra followed by intermission (so the prepared folks who brought earplugs could take them out). Both orchestras were atrocious. I mean "eeee, ee, eeeeee, eee, eeeeee, eeeee, eeee" torturing a mouse bad.

The chorus was blah. I used to be in chorus and I always thought we sounded really good. This chorus sucked. They sang a Beatles medley and I don't think they even know who the Beatles are!

Then another orchestra. I tried to think happy calming thoughts while my ears were being assaulted.

Then the band with my cousin on the trumpet. The band sounded good except for one wind instrument (maybe a saxophone that was flat the entire time).

And, finally, it was over. My ears have still not recovered.